Greater Houston Blood Bowl League feed

Match: Merry Wives of Norseland (2) vs. Dirty Rotten Scoundrel (0)

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 22:55:31 -0500

In preparation for today's Coronavirus Final, many decisions had been made by Nuffle's officials. First, only a paltry few would be allowed to attend (and those in socially distanced aisles that were sealed off from each other by magical bubbles). Second, the sprinkler system would have disinfectant added to spray down the field between drives. Third, any contact between the two teams would be prevented by magical bubbles around each player. Needless to say, the coach of Nurgle's Dirty Rotten Scoundrels protested mightily, but the royalty of the town had deeper pockets, so the protests fell on deaf ears. Thus did the Coronavirus Final begin, with each team bouncing around and looking...pretty foolish. The Scoundrels discovered how to pop the bubbles first, and quickly KOed two Merry Wives in the beginning of the drive, but the Norse women struck back and KOed a Nurgle Warrior. Once all the bubbles were popped, the game began in earnest. Jeremy, the multi-armed Pestigor ball handler, scooped up the ball and strode down the field only to be boxed in by the stingy Norse defense. The Plague proceeded to lose track of which side of the field it was on, and the Wives stormed through the hole in the line, quickly knocking out Jeremy and collecting the ball. The Scoundrels weren't out yet, however - they tripped the Merry Wife with the ball and the ball started bouncing through the puddles of disinfectant...which caused the Scoundrels to shy away. Bubbles Zombie scooped up the ball and managed to get into the end zone before the first half ended. With the second half starting (and a fresh layer of disinfectant on the field) the ball was kicked to the Merry Wives, who were still a bit short handed as two of their members had been forced to drink disinfectant and were still woozy in the KO box. Still, Bubbles Zombie scooped up the ball and ran down the left sideline where Scarlet Nerfherder and Cadence Oilslick were holding open a free cooridor. The Scoundrels tried in vain to stop Bubbles, but to no avail, and the Merry Wives scored an insurmountable second score. In true Nurgle fashion, the Scoundrels proceeded to spend the rest of the game headhunting Wives for new Rotters, but again the sheer amount of disinfectant stymied them. Covered in suds and avoiding as much touching as possible, the Merry Wives of Norseland win the Coronavirus Cup 2-0, also scoring 2-0 in CAS.

Match: Defective Goods (1) vs. Merry Wives of Norseland (3)

Sat, 21 Nov 2020 00:20:04 -0500

In a game which put the Blood in a Blood Bowl game played somewhere else, the 1st round of the Nurgle Playoffs was played between Defective Goods and the Merry Wives of Norseland. Many fans came from miles around to watch mayhem, only to see the ladies of the Merry Wives dance around the forces of chaos and KO them with impunity for the first half. After a quick score, the Wives proceeded to steal the ball away from China during a sprinkler malfunction that hit the dark elf in the eyes. Picking up the wet ball with ease, Bubbles Zombie sprinted in to score for the second time before the half. The second half started a little better for Defective Goods, as they started to knock out Wives here and there. The Wives' defense was stout and held until the two minute warning, where Goods finally punched in a score. Trying to get the ball from the Wives with so little time remaining proved fruitless, although things got interesting until China tripped on a go for it. Bubbles Zombie scooped up the ball and scored the back breaker TD as time expired, allowing the Merry Wives to escape with a 3-1 victory. Surprisingly, only one casualty was reported by both sides (considering that these teams were the casualty leaders in the league!) and no severe injuries beyond a slight concussion that was treated by docs and patched up before the game was even over.

Match: Butcherburg Roasters (2) vs. Blackhold Boars (2)

Sun, 04 Oct 2020 19:20:43 -0400

Tie game that pitted veteran coach against a brand new coach. The boars were able to put the hurt on a few peach’s, but the most interesting development was #7.5 Adam Applecore committing suicide as he tried to dodge away from BOB Don Spikefist.

Match: Merry Wives of Norseland (1) vs. Defective Goods (1)

Sun, 21 Jun 2020 20:51:58 -0400

In a game of teams at the top of the leader board, fans were treated to a LOT of blood in the name Blood Bowl. Starting with the kickoff, the Merry Wives drove down quickly and inflicted several casualties, but Defective Goods gave as good as they got. Two Norsewomen were knocked out quickly, and spent the rest of the game in the KO box as they were unable to be revived. The big boys of Defective Goods were as good as advertised, but injuries were being dealt out like candy by both sides. It was only at the end of the game that the numbers were finally swinging against the Merry Wives, but they were able to spring the ball loose from a marauder who was streaking for the end zone to clinch the tie. Final score, 1-1 tie. Defective Goods win the CAS battle 4-3, but suffer 4 serious injuries (2 -AV!) to Merry Wives's 2 (including a Niggle).

Match: Merry Wives of Norseland (3) vs. Dirty Rotten Scoundrel (0)

Thu, 12 Mar 2020 19:49:33 -0400

The blood continued to fountain in games of the Merry Wives, but in this case it was the blood of journeywomen. The Dirty Rotten Scoundrels raised Temp #12 and added her to their roster, but that was probably the only positive note on the day, as the roller blading Merry Wives scooted through their lines multiple times and forced several turnovers. At the final gong, the Merry Wives had won 3-0, but lost the CAS battle 2-3 to the Scoundrels.

Match: Merry Wives of Norseland (1) vs. Tex'Zas Dernasurs (1)

Thu, 05 Mar 2020 18:55:59 -0500

A deadly game for both teams as the Merry Wives lost their newly hired Werewolf and a Linewoman, while the Dernasurs lost a Chameleon. And that was just the fatalities! After the Dernasurs got 4 casualties in the first three turns, the Merry Wives were playing desperation ball thereafter, and escaped with a draw.

Match: Pokethulhu Wrasslers (1) vs. Cereal And Water (1)

Thu, 20 Feb 2020 19:52:12 -0500

Bodies flew, snotlings were captured into dodecahedrons and not even Star Players could tell who won at the end. And Kurt Karpian scored one of the TDs! Alas, it was another Ogre on Ogre match which ends in a draw.

Announcement by temujin71: Season 19 Dragonfruit Bowl Playoffs

Thu, 20 Feb 2020 11:53:54 -0500

Finals

Witches Get Stitches 2 - Green Eggs and Hamm 1

3rd Place Game

Double Decker Pecker Wrecker - Orc's Land Raydors

Semifinals

Witches Get Stitches 2 - Double Decker Pecker Wrecker 0 Orc's Land Raydors 1 - Green Eggs and Hamm 2

Quarterfinals

Zharrduk Muzzleloaders 1 - Witches Get Stitches 2 Double Decker Pecker Wrecker 2 - Dah Praktiss Skwad 0 Second Circle Daemonettes 0 - Orc's Land Raydors 2 Amazon Forest 0 - Green Eggs and Hamm 2

Match: Merry Wives of Norseland (0) vs. The Chads (0)

Thu, 06 Feb 2020 21:43:17 -0500

After a blistering first game where elven body parts were flying around the field (usually not connected to the correct bodies, either!), the second game of the Rookie League was quite a bit closer...but just as deadly! Dwarven body parts flew around the stadium as the usual stout armor proved no match for the Merry Wives' nagging. Alas, at the end, neither team could get an advantage in either score or casualties. So, reckoning themselves lucky, the Chads fled the field before the Wives could get into a REAL haranguing position!

Match: Rollin’ Thunder (0) vs. Pokethulhu Wrasslers (0)

Thu, 06 Feb 2020 21:38:15 -0500

In the inaugural game of the Osterland Cup, the smashing of two ogre teams together could be heard for miles. After much bashing and flying of snotlings, the Pokethulhu Wrasslers proved to be the most deadly, but no victor could be found. Many body parts could not be found either...

Match: Double Decker Pecker Wrecker (2) vs. Dah Praktiss Skwad (0)

Wed, 05 Feb 2020 22:39:26 -0500

It was a poor showing for Dah Praktiss Skwad, and a good showing for the Double Decker Pecker Wrecker. The Wreckers must have been out for blood because they quickly removed a number of players, forcing Dah Skwad to play an orc or two down the majority of the game. A lack of block seemed to be the undoing of the Black Orcs as they rolled them a number of times over the course of the game. The thrower failed three consecutive times to pick the ball up to start his own offense, once uncontested and twice contested by a single bull centaur. That was the first stab at a score. Later there was the somewhat longshot pass - handoff to get a score, but that was not in the cards either. The strength and speed of the paired Bull Centaurs proved to be tough to stop once the defense was pinned down. Gluk and Glaver proved to be true hobgoblins with their opportunistic fouling. Gluk took a black orc out (saved by the doc) and the Glaver was thrown out. Nicely played Wreckers, see you season after next!

Match: Morning Wood (0) vs. Merry Wives of Norseland (2)

Thu, 30 Jan 2020 20:21:03 -0500

Morning Wood v1: #1: 2 Cp #2: -Ag injury #3: Niggle injury #6: -St injury #8: BH #10: 1 Kill +30k winnings, no FF, no MVP rolled. Results cleared pending reset.

Match: Dah Praktiss Skwad (3) vs. The Fancy Lads (4)

Thu, 16 Jan 2020 20:55:40 -0500

The Fancy Lads were in good form, but so was Dah Praktiss Skwad. A blitz and poor positioning on the part of Dah Praktiss Skwad saw the Fancy Lads take possession and score on defense. From here on out it turned into a "Touchdown Derby" with neither side able to put up a good defense. Each side on average took about two or three turns to score; the elves were down a few players but agility, speed, and a few choice KOs and casualties of their own allowed them to still put on a good offence. A whooping nine completions were thrown this game with only one missed pass. The missed pass was thrown by an orc lineman, who was accurate, but dropped by the otherwise crack goblin catcher. The newly minted kicker managed to kick the ball out of bounds once and nearly succeeded in doing the same two other times he kicked. Match commented upon by the coaches of the "Double Decker Pecker Wreckers" and the "Born to Bone".

Match: Pokethulu Wranglers (0) vs. Amazon Forest (0)

Sat, 28 Dec 2019 20:12:17 -0500

And thus ends another ogre saga of failure. ALL HAIL HYPNOTOAD!

Match: Double Decker Pecker Wrecker (1) vs. Dah Praktiss Skwad (2)

Wed, 18 Dec 2019 13:17:47 -0500

Early injuries gave the upper hand to the Orcs, but the Chaos Dwarfs were able to hold the line and put up solid defense in spite of being a Bull Centaur down. The Orcs decided to kick to the Dwarfs and were able to get the ball away from them and eventually score a touch down late in the first half. The dwarfs were able to drive up the field in the second half and run one of their own in after they had broken through. In the remaining turns of the first half, the orcs were able to recover the ball after the goblin carrying it had been tackled and run it in with a lineman.

Match: Pokethulu Wranglers (0) vs. Outbreak (0)

Sat, 07 Dec 2019 19:14:04 -0500

After squelching through the wet marshlands that the previous stadium had become, our menagerie of horrors discovered their true match - another menagerie of horrors, this time of disease! Nurgle met Cthulhu in a match of brawn vs brawn that shook the ground for miles around! Winning the toss, the Wranglers chose to receive and start bashing first. This proved to be an ill choice, as the kick did not go the way they wanted, and a scrum broke out quickly with all ogres smashing each other in a very small contained space. Surprisingly, no injuries were recorded in this first half - not even to the greebles that tried to interfere at every opportunity! One Wrangler ogre was knocked out near the end of the half, but the Pokethulhu docs had him up and frothing during halftime. The halftime speeches by both coaches seemed to work, however - both side's ogres came out to play energized, and very quickly one snotling was ripped apart or inhaled on both sides. The Outbreak had gotten the ball to their sure hands ogre, only to have a pinpoint snotling thrown by Stone-chu hit him between the eyes. With the ball loose, and many ogres drooling on both sides, a lucky bounce got to a Wrangler ogre and he lumbered for the end zone...only to be blitzed off his feet by Señor Influenzo. With the ball loose again, both sides scrabbled after it ineffectually while swatting snotlings everywhere. Finally, the gong sounded with both sides nearly out of snotlings, but with no advantage to either team. The Wranglers had a slight advantage in casualties, 2-1, but no score for either side.

Match: Dah Praktiss Skwad (1) vs. Born to Bone (0)

Sat, 07 Dec 2019 00:46:14 -0500

Strong defense on both sides, Dah Praktiss Skwad hit well, hurt little. On the other side of the pitch Funf had a fantastic game; taking out two black orcs over the course of the match.

Announcement by temujin71: 2519 Bugmans Orktoberfest Invitational Playoffs

Wed, 04 Dec 2019 16:42:59 -0500

Finals

Rebel Dead 1 - Ulthuan Phoenix Kings 3

3rd Place Game

Pfungzig Fiddleheads 0 - Brothers of Woe 1

Semifinals

Rebel Dead 2 - Pfungzig Fiddleheads 1 Brothers of Woe 1 - Ulthuan Phoenix Kings 2

Quarterfinals

Rebel Dead 2 - Green Peace 0 Pfungzig Fiddleheads 2 - Mad Mayo: Curry Road 1 Lone Moon Outlaws 1 - Brothers of Woe 2 Nebruck’s Bonecrushers 1 - Ulthuan Phoenix Kings 3

Match: Pokethulu Wranglers (0) vs. Dah Praktiss Skwad (1)

Tue, 26 Nov 2019 23:56:50 -0500

Fresh off of the spectacular loss to the Peckers, the colorful menagerie of Pokethulhu Wranglers had to recuperate and lick their wounds. Their practice field was currently in the middle of typhoon level winds and rain, so they figured it was a perfect place to lay low. Unfortunately, intrepid orks of Dah Praktiss Skwad used that field to shelter from the torrential rain...and a game broke out! In a bout of insanity only a masochistic Sea God would love, Dah Praktiss Skwad first triggered the sprinkler system. Thus, for the entire first half, no one could actually see the ball since water was coming from above AND below at the same time! The menagerie used this confusion to good effect and smashed many orks into the KO box by the end of the half, but the score was still nil-nil. The second half still was in mid-typhoon, but at least the sprinklers had been disabled. In a back and forth battle, the ogres of the Wranglers seemed to tire and become more boneheaded as the game went on, and it took a phenomenal amount of dodgy tackling for a goblin to sneak through, pick up the ball, dodge 4 tacklers and then score just before the end of the game. The Wrangler faithful rioted at this point, and the resultant confusion allowed two ogres to smash two orks out of the game. Thoroughly wet, both teams left the stadium before the typhoon could get any worse. With no major injuries on either side, wounds had been licked, and both teams now were ready to move on in the season...and the final ogre was hired!

Match: The Fancy Lads (2) vs. The Flames (1)

Sun, 10 Nov 2019 17:46:40 -0500

The Flames blew not one, not two, but three chances for easy TDs in the first half. Harry "Sure Hands" Handler failed twice to catch passes from Napoleon Cannon who then tripped at the goalline and fumbled. The Fancy Lads catcher Kyrenik "The Chronic" blazed past the flames for two TDs in the game off of throws from Celeborn Eagle-Ey. A third completion would have resulted in a third Kyrenik TD were it not for a boneshatering hit by Tex Scramm which separated the Fancy Lads catcher from the ball near the goalline. The Flames did manage to get on the board in the second half when Brutus Passmore took a Tex Scramm pass and followed excellent blocking down the middle of the field for a score. While the Fancy Lads prevailed 2-1, it was at a dear cost. Newly acquired journeyman To be Named Later was carried from the field after he was blindsided by Flames Blitzer Buck Wagner. He would die in the locker room from the injuries, but hay sports fans, that's Blood Bowl.